My Freshman Year of College: The Truth

My freshman year gave me more than new friends and knowledge–  it also helped me find a passion. I was able to fuel my interest in helping those in need around me. I was able to spend a lot of my time giving back to my community and it fulfilled me. It was also nice being able to be around other people who loved to volunteer as well because you should always surround yourself with positive influences.

A few weeks ago, I officially finished my freshman year of college, and it was great.

Now that’s not a phrase I ever imagined myself saying. Mostly because I’m a first generation college student and even though I’ve always known that I wanted to be a college student, I was never entirely sure if it was an achievable goal for me. I don’t come from a necessarily prosperous family and I didn’t really have much guidance when it came to choosing which college would be my future home, but I went with my gut and decided to go to a college that was three hours away from my home in a town that I had never even visited before.

So, it’s safe to say that I was petrified when I first walked onto that campus. I only had one friend, I was unsure of my major, and I was gut-wrenchingly homesick within the matter of hours. On my first day of orientation, I actually locked myself into the communal bathroom in my hall and cried for fifteen minutes just because I was so unsure if I was meant to be a college student.

I didn’t understand so many things, like dorm etiquette and how to get my roommate to like me and what is the best way to buy text books and should I get involved in clubs and if so which clubs should I join and there were just— so many questions that I was too terrified to ask anyone because I was too embarrassed to own up to the fact that I was not nearly as well-versed in the intricate workings of college like how everyone else appeared to be. I missed my friends, my family, my dog. I missed having the security of being at home.

And I stayed that way for, I don’t know, the first few weeks? The feeling of homesickness was just so difficult to get rid of. And I was so upset with myself for not being happier at college because I worked so hard to get where I was and then for a while I wasn’t even that secure in my decision. I wanted to talk to someone about how lost I felt, but I was too ashamed. I didn’t want people to see that I wasn’t as strong as I had let on.

But then, I hit a point where I decided to stop wallowing in the feeling of homesickness and take the leap to do more than go to college and actually enjoy college. I stopped spending all of my time in my room and made myself branch out. I went to the events that were held for freshmen to make us feel more welcome, and I asked around to see which clubs people recommended. I ended up being intrigued into joining two different organizations: a leadership club for freshmen and a sorority.

Joining these two different organizations changed my college experience in ways that I can’t explain. I surrounded myself with people who pushed me to be better versions of myself. They motivated me to do community service, meet new people, and maintain my GPA. The mixture of these clubs also helped me meet people from all across campus and even get familiar with the new city I was living in. I found myself in a new community filled with so many loving, passionate people who have so much greatness destined for them that it made me feel like I was destined for greatness too.

I still got homesick at times, and I even had a few close loved ones pass away over the course of my first semester. But since I branched out and formed close relationships on campus, I was able to find people to lean on during the hard times.

If I didn’t have them, I would have definitely dropped out after my first midterms. And not even because I had bad grades or anything, but because I would have still felt so miserably alone and homesick.

My freshman year gave me more than new friends and knowledge–  it also helped me find a passion. I was able to fuel my interest in helping those in need around me. I was able to spend a lot of my time giving back to my community and it fulfilled me. It was also nice being able to be around other people who loved to volunteer as well because you should always surround yourself with positive influences.

And these positive influences helped me push myself during my second semester. I found the confidence to run for positions in both of my organizations and ended up getting places in both. I was able to help more with community service in my sorority and somehow was given the position of president of my leadership club. I tried to set a good example to others during that second semester and push everyone else to get involved too because of how rewarding the experience can be. I found myself realizing how much I have grown as a leader and just as a person in general during my first year at college, and I realized I wanted to help others grow too.

During this time, I also had a few other experiences like trying sushi and going to an art museum and just living life with less fear than I had before college. I went from a girl who was terrified of living the simple comfort of her home in the country to a woman that was embracing all of the possibilities the city had to offer. I knew that I was changing, and for the first time in my life I wasn’t scared of the change.

I feel like college pushed me in so many ways to want to do more, to be more, and I wouldn’t trade that for anything. I made so many new lifelong friends, challenged my old mindsets, and grew as a leader in ways I cannot describe. I know that I had a rough patch in the start, but I wouldn’t trade my college experience for anything.

And I can only hope that my sophomore year of college is just as amazing as this year.

I hope that you enjoyed this little journal entry of sorts. Feel free to share what your college experience was like! Be sure to like, comment, and follow! 

IMG_1066 2

Are Your Friends Good For You?

Toxic friendships are hard to spot, because it is often difficult to be able to take a step back and realize that the relationship you have with someone is being mentally harmful to you. So, how are you supposed to decide when friendships are toxic? 

Friends, they come in different shapes, sizes– and dynamics.

We all have friends. But, not every friendship is the same. There are the friendships where your counterpart knows every secret that you own, and then there are the ones where you never delve far beneath the surface of formalities. And one of these types of friendships aren’t necessarily superior to the other, because we all need different types of friendships at different times in our lives. But, there is a type of friendship that you should try to avoid at all costs: and that is a toxic friendship.

And toxic friendships are hard to spot, because it is often difficult to be able to take a step back and realize that the relationship you have with someone is being mentally harmful to you. So, how are you supposed to decide when friendships are toxic?

First off, you can decide if a friendship is good for you or not by thinking about how you feel after spending time with them. If a being around a certain friend consistently makes you feel anxious or upset with yourself, then they’re probably not a good friend. If your friend is mentally tearing you down or treats you in a certain way that makes you feel less confident in yourself, then that is just simply someone you should not keep around in your life if you have the option. Life is a short adventure, so don’t waste your time on someone that will make you stop appreciating the beauty of it. If you can’t make yourself enjoy the time you spend a friend, then why continue to spend time with them?

Another sign that a friendship might be toxic is if you have an intense amount of competition with them. A bit of friendly competition is okay, seeing as it can push you to expand your limits and work to become a better version of yourself. But, when the friendship becomes entirely centered on besting them and always trying to be one step ahead of your friend, then it is no longer healthy. It’s not really a friendship if the only time you put energy into the relationship is to try to be better than the other. Especially because if you let this become a full-blown rivalry but you end up needing a shoulder to lean on, the chance of that friend taking anything you confide to them to use against you is extremely likely.

Speaking of a friendship that is bordering on becoming frenemies, you should also think about being careful befriending someone that you feel resentment towards. If you find yourself being close with someone that you want to talk badly about after they leave the room– don’t. Don’t be that friend who is slightly two-faced because if you want to gossip harshly about your supposed friend, then the people who witness you act that way will not want to trust you as a friend either. Anyways, if you don’t genuinely enjoy being friends with someone, then don’t be. You know that you don’t want to have a toxic friendship in your life, so you should also make the effort to not be the toxic friend either.

Overall, friendships should be something that have a positive impact in your life. The friendship does not have to be deep and soul-bearing, and you don’t even have to love the unconditionally. But you should want to smile when you think of your friend. A good friend doesn’t tear you down, and you shouldn’t want to tear that friend down either. Life can be crazy and unpredictable, and you want to have a good friendship that you can rely on. They might not be perfect, but if a friendship makes you happy then it is most definitely worth it. Just make sure that the friendship is actually good for you.

tumblr_oogybpnelP1uwrap4o1_500.jpg

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thanks for reading, please like, comment, and follow!

IMG_1066 2

My Summer Bucket List

During summertime, you become consumed with this need to do something, whether it be to take risks and go adventures or maybe just start a diet and work out more often. I feel like everyone feels kind of restless during the summer, so it is important to have a kind of outline of what you wish to accomplish during this period of time when the sky is the limit.

There’s something so special about summer. Maybe it’s the fresh air, the flowers in full bloom, or the warm weather– but there is something so specifically thrilling about this certain time that sparks a new life into your soul. During summertime, you become consumed with this need to do something, whether it be to take risks and go adventures or maybe just start a diet and work out more often. I feel like everyone feels kind of restless during the summer, so it is important to have a kind of outline of what you wish to accomplish during this period of time when the sky is the limit.

And personally, there are several things that I want to do during this summer, so I decided to write down all of the adventures that I hope to take part of this summer. Here are just a few of the things that I hope to do over the next few months.

 1. Eat healthier and work out more

I feel like this is on everyone’s bucket list. Which, why shouldn’t it be? If you have a desire to live a healthier lifestyle, then why not try to aspire to do so? I mean, knowing me, I’m definitely not gonna follow through. But hey, at least I took the initiative to add it my list, right? I feel like I deserve a gold star or something for taking that step.

2. Get a tan

Again, this is another basic thing everyone aspires to do over the summer. I feel like there should be some sort of scientific study conducted to see why people are so much happier when they get a tan. I personally believe it’s because my skin is as white as Elmer’s Glue and it is always a welcome change to not have your skin instantly reflect any ounce of light that it comes in contact with.

But, I do have to state that while I’ll try to attempt to cross this off of my bucket list, I will most definitely get a sunburn and then, without a doubt, will complain relentlessly about the sunburn until it fades into a tan.

3. Revamp my wardrobe 

Honestly, I’m getting tired of wearing the same clothes that I’ve had since middle school. Especially since I’m not in high school anymore and dress codes no longer exist, I personally feel like I should take this opportunity and buy as many rompers as my basic white girl heart desires.

4. Have a photoshoot with a friend

A little hardly-known fact about me is that I’m that friend that is obsessed with pictures. If we are ever at any type of event, I will without a doubt take a thousand pictures of you in different places and poses because I love to make my friends feel beautiful. I’ve always wanted to have a little photoshoot just for fun and because I love taking pictures, and I feel like this would be a great way to spend some quality time with a pal.

5. Make some crafts 

Okay, so you know when you’re scrolling through Instagram or Facebook and you start by looking at all of the updates on your friends’ lives and then suddenly you’re watching the fiftieth DIY about how to make a wreath out of a hoola hoop and some twine? Well, after doing this at least a thousand times, I feel like I should probably set a goal to do at least now craft over the summer. Especially because I find crafting to be super calming.

And yes, I completely understand that this goal makes me sound like a soccer mom.

6. Go to the mountains

My favorite place in the world is the mountains. It’s so breathtakingly beautiful up there and the fact that you automatically lose service once you get up high enough makes you connect with the serene beauty around you in a way that is just so freeing. The certain mountains that I love to visit also happens to have several amazing restaurants and museums that are some of my favorite places to go when on a trip. If you want to know more about what I do when I visit the mountains, I’ll more than likely make a blog about it once I visit, so stay tuned!

7.Visit some friends from college

College has blessed me with meeting some of the most amazing and genuine souls in my life, I know that I haven’t known these new people for that long, but being in a close proximity to them 24/7 for months has kind of spoiled me with being able to see them at any given moment. My life became so dependent on these people that were complete strangers less than a year ago and I legitimately do not know how I survived before I met them. I miss them already and we haven’t even been apart for a month yet, so I plan on taking a road trip to visit some college friends and reconnect.

8. Host a bonfire 

When it’s summer, it’s like this unwritten law that you have to gorge yourself on smores. And where there are smores, there must be a bonfire. There’s nothing more cliche and entertaining than being able to set beside a fire and laugh into the starry night with some of your closest friends on a warm summer night. I personally feel like this item should have a spot on every person’s summer bucket list simply because bonfires are so great.

9. Build my confidence

This is more of a personal goal, one that I have tried to accomplish for years now. I’m not the most confident person, and I want to try to work on that. So, this summer I’m planning on doing enough self-care and affirmation to myself that hopefully I leave the summer just the tiniest bit more confident.

10. Read (at least) two books

I love reading and I think it is always important to continue expanding your mind even when you are not expected to. Also, there are tons of great books out there that I have told myself I am going to read but just haven’t gotten around to it yet. So why not take the time to treat myself to a good book or two?

11. Have a picnic

Picnics are the best. I remember when I was younger, I always wondered why in movies there were always so many picnic dates, but now I completely understand why. I went on one picnic that was supposed to last for about half an hour but I ended up staying there for over four hours. There was something just so serene about being able to eat and chat with some of your closest friends in the shade as you watch everyone else walk by and enjoy the sunshine too. If you’re ever feeling down– go on a picnic. Trust me, the best way to eat a sandwich is to go outside and have to fight off seventy ants while doing so.

12. Go to the beach

Ninky Menjaj said it best when she said “let’s go to the beach beach!” (Please someone get that vine reference). I love the beach, I love the ocean, I love all of the restaurants by the beach, I love being able to wake up and hear waves crashing against the sun. There are just so many things to love about the beach that a summer is never complete without visiting it. Now, here’s to hoping my wallet can handle a trip to the beach.

(Spoiler alert: it can’t).

13. Build the perfect summer playlist

I’m currently in the works of this right now because the key to making amazingly memorable moments is to have the perfect song crooning in the background. But, making the perfect playlist to fit the exciting vibe of summer has started to prove difficult, so if you have any suggestions please share some with me!

14. Go to an Amusement Park

Rollercoasters, funnel cakes, ferris wheels, oversized pizza slices, and water slides. Need I say more? I love amusement parks, and I am lucky enough to have one at a reasonable distance from my home, so I’ll definitely be crossing this one off of my list. There’s nothing better than combining a sugar high with an adrenaline rush, am I right?

15. Go to a music festival

I love music, I love being outside, and I love having an excuse to dress in outrageous outfits. And music festivals somehow are able to combine all of the things that I love into one. Ever since I was little, I always wanted to have a Woodstock-esque experience and be able to sway to some of my favorite songs on a beautiful summer day.

And that’s my summer bucket list. I hope that I can cross all of these items off of my list without breaking the bank, and I’ll be sure to update you guys with my progress!

Be sure to comment below items on your summer bucket list, I want to see what you guys hope to accomplish this season. As always, give me a like and a follow. I am making sure to follow everyone back!

Have a great summer and stay rad–

IMG_1066 2

 

Eternally Single

First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes pushing a baby carriage. This is supposed to be the general outline of an adult life. 

But what happens if you can’t even find love?

First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes pushing a baby carriage. This is supposed to be the general outline of an adult life.

But what happens if you can’t even find love?

No, I’m serious. What if you genuinely seem to be incapable of loving another person in a romantic way? What if you have spent the entirety of your life being single and honestly don’t see that changing anytime soon? What are you supposed to do, invest in cat toys?

And, as a quick disclaimer, I want you to be aware of the fact that this is in no way me making a half-assed ploy to lure someone into loving me. Because I truly don’t know if I am made for love. This is no way a self-depreciating statement, either. I just honestly find myself to be too independent and too unwilling to let myself fall in love when I have other important things to do like build up my resume, maintain my GPA, and prepare for a future where I can be happy and successful. I’m not writing this to have comments saying “don’t worry, love will come your way soon!” or “Don’t be so hard on yourself! Love will come at the time when you least expect it!”

I haven’t expected love in the last nineteen years of my life, and it hasn’t made it’s advances to me. And honestly, I’m happy with not being loved.

There’s something in my brain that just makes me feel this adverse reaction to love. When someone shows genuine affection or attraction to me, I feel repulsed.

Seriously.

Love repulses me. And that’s like the opposite of what I should feel. So. There’s that.

And, no, I’m not saying that there is not a chance that there might be someone to come into my life and change my entire outlook. There is definitely a chance of that happening, and as I have learned from the great philosopher, Justin Bieber, you should “never say never.” But right now I seriously cannot see myself falling in love.

I feel like I’m at the point of my life where there are so many things up in the air. I mean, I am in the first breaths of being an adult, and I quite honestly don’t think I am a balanced enough of a person to be able to prioritize myself as well as a partner. In this certain era of my life, I have some serious questions to answer. I have to figure out what I want to do as a career, where I want to live, and learn how to manage adult things like taxes and health insurance. And don’t even get me started on how much money it takes to provide myself the bare essentials like food and water and wifi. At this point, I am a minimally functioning adult with a lot of learning left to do. I can hardly take care of myself and keep myself happy. How can I provide for a partner too on top of that?

And I know that having someone to love might release some of my stress, but I just genuinely can’t see myself loving someone. Every time I get emotionally close to someone, I feel consumed with this need to push them away. Also, in this day and age, it is increasingly hard to be a virgin in a relationship. Especially if you don’t plan on losing your virginity anytime soon. But that’s a whole other blog post.

I think at this point in time, I am just confused. Love is confusing. Everyone around me seems to be on the prowl for their future husband. Or for their next lay. But either way neither of those things interest me. And I know everyone says that I will find love when I’m ready, but what if I am never ready?

What if love just isn’t for me? What happens then? Am I destined to live a life that is akin to every Tina Fey movie ever where everyone around me thrives and finds love and I funnel my entire life into my job because it is my only sense of purpose? Seriously, what happens?

Society acts like a woman’s only purpose is to fall in love and have children. But what about the women that are happier being single? Do I have no purpose anymore?

I wish I could find the answers to my questions. But it’s not like you can just go online and say “Hey Google, I am a coldhearted idiot who seems to be incapable of loving. Fix me!”

So, that’s why I’m writing this. Is there anyone else who is eternally single too? Did someone think that they were destined to be single forever but then their soulmate came in and changed everything? Should I try to force myself into dating even though I hate it?

Seriously, what am I supposed to do?

Woes of a Child Prodigy

They told me I was smart, they told me that I was destined for greatness. All because I bubbled in correct answers on a standardized test. I understand that she said those things to motivate me, to push me onto the correct path. But all she really did was put an obscene amount of stress on a child’s shoulders. My teachers, family, and classmates looked at me like I was ‘advanced,’ and I believed it. I took every word that she said to heart and tried to be the prodigy that she painted me out to be.

But what she forgot to forewarn me of is that every human inevitably has to fail.

When I was six years old, I was pulled out of my math class and was told that I was ‘special.’

They talked about my subpar test scores, and for the first time in my life I had the mentality that I was supposed to be perfect drilled in my head. My teacher spoke to me in words that were too large for my young self to fully understand, but I walked out of her small office with an entirely new outlook on life.

They told me I was smart, they told me that I was destined for greatness. All because I bubbled in correct answers on a standardized test. I understand that she said those things to motivate me, to push me onto the correct path. But all she really did was put an obscene amount of stress on a child’s shoulders. My teachers, family, and classmates looked at me like I was ‘advanced,’ and I believed it. I took every word that she said to heart and tried to be the prodigy that she painted me out to be.

But what she forgot to forewarn me of is that every human inevitably has to fail.

Everybody screws up, that is just part of life. But when you are told from a very young age that you are special and above average, failure simply does not seem like an option for you. Any grade that is not a hundred makes you feel like you should be doing more. Any question that you might have should be left unsaid because it is expected of you to understand everything at a faster rate than everyone else. This mentality of expecting for yourself to be better than you actually are makes you spiral quickly into failure.

And when you fail, it feels like you are doing more than just failing yourself. You feel like you have let down your parents, your teachers, and your peers. It’s a harsh fall from superiority to realizing that nothing about you makes you any more special than anybody else. And while it does help you gain perspective about life that every person has something that makes them special in some way, it can still hurt you greatly.

The transition from knowing that you are something special to realizing that you are nothing has caused for an increased spike in teenage depression in the past few years. This flawed system of dividing kids at a young age due to their academic performance has created an environment that builds stress for children on both sides of the spectrum.

Why was there never a lesson where the teacher explained that every person has the capability to be extraordinary, and that academics is not the most important aspect of one’s personality? When will we not feel confined to the labels we were given at a young age?

Being a child prodigy was not easy, especially now that I am an average student at best. But being on the opposite side of the spectrum was not easy for those students either. I get aggravated with myself for not living up to everyone else’s expectations, but I know on the other side that the ones who were labelled as below-average are proud of themselves for not confining themselves to the expectations they had years ago.

I believe that this means that, overall, we should not define ourselves to others expectations. Part of growing up is realizing that you’re going to mess up, but also that sometimes you will succeed. How you performed on a standardized test in first grade does not define the person that you are now, and it shouldn’t.

The only thing that should define who you are is yourself.

An Honest Letter for High School Seniors

As May quickly approaches and the life that you were so familiar with is coming to an end, you can’t help but to ask yourself: what now?

As May quickly approaches and the reality of the fact that the life that you have lived for the last thirteen years is about to end, you can’t help but to worry.
For the majority of your life, you have been told how to feel, how to dress, what to eat, and even when to use the bathroom. You were discouraged from being too expressive, and might have even gotten in trouble for trying to make decisions for yourself. The schooling system is extremely robotic and honestly exhausting, but you cannot help but to feel a crushing wave of fear once you realize that in a few short months you will be released to the world and nobody will be there to control your every move. The prospect of this freedom can seem both daunting and exhilarating.
For the first time in your life, you can get in a car and drive away for hours if you desire to.
For the first time in your life, you can do ‘adult’ things like buying a house, getting married, and having children without having society judge you for it.
For the first time in your life, you get to choose.
And I know people might act like the only option for you after high school is college. Or they might act like you should immediately enter the workforce. Or they might even tell you that you should get married and start a family because you won’t stay young forever. And any of those things are completely valid options and you should consider everything that interests you, but the most important thing that you can do during this time of your life is to do what makes you happy.
I know that you are scared, that you feel like the choices you make at this very moment can determine your entire future. I know that you might feel that you should be doing one thing to make those around you happy even though something else might draw to you more. I know that you are worried about losing the friendships that you have had for years.
And, here’s a secret that nobody likes to tell us. It is absolutely okay to be scared.
Do you think that our parents knew exactly what they were going to do for the rest of their life when they were seventeen years old? Do you think that your grandparents knew that they would one day spending most of their retirement scrolling through Facebook? Do you think that ANYBODY is 100% certain in the decisions that they make?
Of course not!
We are humans. We make mistakes. We do not know the answer to everything. And I know sometimes it might feel like everybody else around you has their life perfectly planned out, but I promise it is not.
Life is a fluid thing. You might think that you are destined to be a teacher in a middle school right now, but when you go to college and you could realize that you despise education classes. Or you might think that you want to immediately go into the workforce, and find yourself six months later googling online classes to be an engineer. Everything can change in the blink of an eye because nothing is ever set in stone. You can be the happiest you ever been on one day and then experiencing your biggest heartbreak the next.
Not many things are in our control, and that just becomes more evident when you graduate high school and are no longer taking part of a daily routine. But the most vital thing that is in your control is your freedom of choice.
Don’t let the people around you make your decisions in life for you. Look inside your heart, find what makes you feel excited, and chase after that.
Are you going to screw up as you navigate through your life? Of course. Everybody does. Are you going to experience moments where you feel like you are lost and alone? Sadly, yes. But those moments are what makes the times when you’re smiling so hard that you feel like your cheeks are going to break so much more worth it.
I know it can be scary to have this era of your life end, but you need to remember that this is not the end of your life. This is simply just the start of your next chapter.

Welcome to the Real World

Do you have zero idea about what to do with your life? Do you feel like you are letting everyone that you care about down?

Welcome to the real world.

For essentially the first two decades of our lives, we are controlled.

Every thought we have, every meal we eat, every choice we make, hell, every time that we use the bathroom was closely monitored by the adults in our lives. We are told to be independent and strive for greatness, but in the same breath we are reminded that if we break any of the thousands of norms that society has established for us, we fail at life. Everyone from our parents to our peers to our teachers are molding us into this codependent human being that feels trepidation before making any type of decision alone. And if we try to break free and make decisions for ourselves that aren’t traditional, we are immediately berated and forced back into the confines of society.

And we don’t complain, because the confines are the only thing that we know.

Until we reach the magic age of eighteen and everything suddenly transforms into a menacing world of self-sufficiency and major life-changing decisions. It is like as soon as you finish your high school degree, everyone thinks that you should automatically have life completely figured out. You are expected to know which college you want to go to, what major you will have, what career you will do for the rest of your life, where you’re going to live, what person you’re going to marry, how many kids you’ll want, if you will live in the suburbs or in the country, and how to file taxes when just a few months ago your school would not even trust you to go to the bathroom by yourself. How does society not see a flaw in this?

We are forced into being codependent, mindless beings for most of our lives and then the next day we are expected to make some of the biggest decisions that we will ever make. And if you express that you are confused or scared, you get berated because “You’re an adult now. You should just know.

But how can we know?

It’s not like our high school systems devote that much time to helping students actually preparing for the real world. We weren’t given courses like “Intro to Tax Forms for Dummies” or “How to Not Drown in Student Debt.” Instead, we spent years of our lives memorizing information to regurgitate back onto the standardized tests that (SPOILER ALERT) actually demonstrate very little of the actual knowledge that we hold and will never be applicable to life outside of the classroom.

And I’m not saying that we should attack teachers for how horribly underprepared we are for life. The teachers want to teach us valuable information and wish that they could break away from the rigid goals of the standardized tests. The problem is not the teachers. It’s the people who think that distinguished test scores are more important than fostering young minds to find passions and gain knowledge that will actually make them grow as a person. It’s the people who get angry at students when they try to express individuality and then later on get upset when the same student tells them that they can’t decide what they’re passionate about.

Students are being dehumanized into walking test scores, and not only is it damaging to our minds. But it sets us so far behind when the real world shoves it’s unrelenting presence in our faces. Students that excelled in school find themselves struggling when success is no longer a game of having a stellar memory. The students who fell behind are entering the world discouraged because they’ve spent their whole life hearing that they are simply just not good enough.

When you are already broken down mentally, it is hard to make massive decisions for yourself. And it is even worse to confess to others that you don’t know what you will ever be able to do with your life because you don’t want to fail at being an adult before you have even got started.

But, there’s a bright side to this. If you’re a young adult finding yourself in a similar position to the one that I’m describing, know that you’re not alone. Seriously.

Nobody has a clue about what to do with their lives.

The girl from your high school who has always been so sure about being an Engineer is probably having a mental breakdown and deciding to be an artist instead. The boy who you always just knew would become a lawyer is probably talking on the phone with his mother right now telling her that he wants to go into journalism instead. And your best friend that is currently a biology major? Be sure to motivate her when she starts crying and tells you that she definitely cannot complete the Gen Eds, let alone actually get a degree to be a doctor. We are all going to change our minds at least a million times about the direction that our lives will go. And when we think we have it figured out, it’ll probably change again because life is funny like that.

I know that this sucks right now. That the construction of the school system and society itself seriously needs to be fixed and that it can be seriously discouraging to feel like you can’t answer any of the thousands of questions being hurled your way. But just know that you are not alone in feeling about the world’s biggest idiot and that everyone is going to mess up. Welcome to the real world.

Let’s mess everything up together.